I have been on a “Let go and let God” effort. I am learning that God loves to help me. That runs completely in contrast to the picture of God waiting to punish me I had years ago.
I am 81 years old now. I hate to have to merge into a busy street. I asked God to help me to get into the traffic flow. A few seconds later a huge tractor trailor pulled into traffic and stopped in a way that for a very short time blocked traffic in both lanes.
I happily and easily pulled into a steet in which I was the only vehicle on the road for a little while. I had to laugh out loud.
When I mess up and act in a way that is not loving I feel that God is not upset with me. I do confess and get my serenity back I make a real effort to understand what was behind my anger. I want to learn from my mistakes.
That is all God wants from me. I wish I never got pissed off but I know I will sooner or later My failings are in my contract with God..
If I learn from my mistakes I gradually reduce the chance I will explode and when I do get angry I will loose it less energetically.