My Wounded Heart

I have included myself in the Me Too movement because of the way my boyhood went sexually. This morning, just 7 hours ago I prayed and asked god to keep on working on the complex damage there is in my personality sexually.

I got up this morning excited to go to my meeting today for many reasons but mostly because there was a woman at the meeting that I have admired and desired who has let me know she was interested in me. I did not go because I tortured myself with the thought that I might have misread her which might mean I would be embarrassed again.

Looking back I see that many women I wanted to be with when I was young made it obvious to me they were interested in me too.I am writing this today because of recent events in the White House. Vice president Biden commented that this situation is appalling. I agree with him but I also think that the deepest sense of being appalled comes to me because our nation elected as President a man that practiced and bragged about abusing woman. It is even more appalling because in Trump’s base constituents are Christian fundamentalists.

I am also writing it for the female gymnasts that have bravely come forward with their stories. I celebrate them because they gave me this healing chance to journal my own experiences. I say to them “I understand the horrific damage the abuse t you have suffered. You are forever in my heart and prayers”.

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