A few years ago, a good friend asked me to go to lunch with him. I gladly agreed to meet him. Then he added “I want to discuss relationships”. I said “Ok, but that feels like you are asking Jack the Ripper to watch your kids”.
I suppose that was not the best image I could have used but it did express my surprise.
I can make good and lasting relationships with both women and men. However,when it comes to romantic relationships my success has always been initiated by the woman not by me.
It is extremely difficult for a man that never achieved closeness with his mom, despite massive efforts on his part, to believe that an attractive woman would want to be in a relationship with him.
When we began our luncheon together we talked about baseball and other safe topics. I enjoyed that very much. I did wonder when we would get to the issue that was on his mind when he gave me the invitation.
Finally he said, “George I walk around this city and I see woman after woman lovingly caring for her child. I see the same thing when I watch TV or go to a movie. Why couldn’t I have had a mother like that?”
I replied “I have no answer for that but I can say that the reason you called me was that I had also had a less than wonderful mom. That you called me illustrates what makes my elder years so full of meaning. I love that I can share my experience strength and hope with people, That doesn’t say I am thankful for how I was raised but it does say anything I surrender to my Higher Power turns from a bad memory into something I highly value.
George Caywood 